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How to stop yourself from ruining international relationships

Ukrainian wife

Love isn’t the easiest thing in the world.

You fall in love with a woman and you sincerely care about each other. However, the ability to maintain a healthy relationship in the long run is not something that everybody has naturally. You would like to make a romantic relationship work and you have read many books on this topic. But in reality, some people may ruin their relationships without knowing it consciously.

Fortunately, there are many ways to stop yourself from ruining a relationship!

Set up the right standards from the beginning of an international relationship.

Maybe a couple have been together for many years and they have some issues now, but closer examination reveals that the real root of their issues did not arise just now. As a matter of fact, the seed of their problems was planted at the early stage of their relationship. Now this seed has grown into a tree.

This can happen as this couple did not set up the right standards at the initial stage of their romantic relationship. At the very beginning, they were so in love with each other. They would do anything for each other, which is totally understandable. As a consequence, they ignored the most paramount part of a sustainable relationship – standards.

Let’s say you expect your girlfriend to have a date night with you once a fortnight, yet she is not willing to do it because she wants to work 100 hours a week. But she is a high-value woman; thus, you are attracted to her, even though she can’t meet your needs.

Nonetheless, a potential issue is this type of attraction may not last for a long time as the dynamics in this romantic relationship and your value system are not really compatible. I know at the initial stage of the relationship, you truly loved her, yet in the long run, you might become resentful.

You may wonder why you are ruining your romantic relationship by getting upset. However, the uncomfortable truth is you did not set up the correct standards earlier. It’s not your fault, but it is definitely your responsibility. But it doesn’t mean you must blame yourself, okay?

You have to set the right standards at the initial stage of an international relationship. If you expect your girlfriend to do this on behalf of you, you might be disappointed. In a relationship, as a man, you either lead or will be misled.

Clearly and correctly communicate your standards to your Ukrainian girlfriend.

When you communicate your standards, please be polite, kind and sincere. It’s a bit easier for a Ukrainian lady to accept your standards when she knows you are genuine and sweet. You will surely attract more bees with honey than vinegar!

Also, you mustn’t play mind games with a Ukrainian woman. Honesty is the best policy when you are talking about your true standards in love. She will certainly appreciate your honesty and integrity.

Let’s say you want her to spend more time with you each week, but she is very busy with her work. Now you can say this to her, “Darling, I know your work is important and your work ethic is admirable. To be honest with you, it would be better for us if we could spend more quality time together as I really miss you when you’re working 100 hours a week.”

In the example above, there is no ‘but’. ‘But’ tends to eliminate the positive ambience. That’s why avoiding ‘but’ is a good strategy!

When you don’t use ‘but’, she is more likely to accept your suggestion!

You have to respect each other’s boundaries in love.

A female friend of mine told me that her partner always brought male friends to their apartment for drinks on weekends. Usually, his loud, noisy and drunk male friends would not leave their apartment until 3am on Saturday! That happened every weekend.

She was unhappy with that. Further analysis shows that this lady and her partner have very different boundaries in love and in life. In her view, her partner should take his male friends to a bar. Yet her partner thinks it’s fine to bring all his friends to his apartment every weekend!

Neither of them is wrong. They simply have very different boundaries in this regard.

So, the solution is to find a happy medium. She might allow her partner to bring male friends to their apartment once a month, and her partner should go to the bar with his male friends on other Friday nights!

Always remember the traits your Ukrainian girlfriend possesses that you absolutely love.

When it comes to your Ukrainian lady, it’s great to witness how the more you focus on the traits she has that you love, the more these traits come forward and the less you notice things that actually bug you about this woman.

Yes, when you tell your Ukrainian woman that you love it when she cooks dinner for you, she will become a better chef, as once you have acknowledged her positive trait, she will be keen to go to that direction even further due to positive reinforcement.

Honestly, if you want her to do what you want, you have to use positive reinforcement frequently in order to make that happen. Of course, you should use this technique in the right way!

Sadly, many individuals complain about their spouses’ certain traits that they dislike. That’s how they ruin their relationships by saying things such as “Don’t waste money on magazines” instead of “Darling, as we are supposed to save money for our home, I would really appreciate it if you could read fashion blogs rather than buying fashion magazines.”

In this example, “don’t” has a negative connotation. In fact, our subconscious mind cannot fully understand the word “don’t”, though we know what it means logically. Consequently, here is what that person actually receives: “Buying magazines is wasting money and my habit annoys my spouse. Now my spouse is blaming me!”

Nobody likes being blamed and it’s more difficult for this person to change their habit. So, using “don’t” frequently might ruin a relationship.

What if you are a senior citizen looking for love?

If you are a senior citizen looking for love online, I know it’s not easy to meet someone suitable fast. As you are already in your 50s or 60s, you have probably built an existing social circle in your life and that is your comfort zone. Thus, it’s relatively difficult to meet new people so as to find a partner in record time. As I see it, success is always somewhere outside of your comfort zone. If you are interested in online dating, you may want to join SimplyDating.com and find a Ukrainian bride who will adore you. Online video chat and automatic translation are available on our website.

“You may consider signing a pre-nup with your new spouse with the help of a family lawyer if you think it’s absolutely necessary.”

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