Internet dating advice: What is ‘the nice guy syndrome’? (And how to recover from it)

Why do women make the rules for “very nice men” and break the rules for those “bad boys”? When women say they want to meet “nice men”, that’s probably not what they actually respond to in reality. ?

• What is the real difference between “nice guys” and “bad boys”?

Honestly, there is a fundamental difference between being nice and being kind. As I see it, being kind is a very good trait which everyone respects, whilst being nice isn’t always great. Here is why:

If you are too nice to ladies, you possibly should ask yourself, “Why am I so nice? Am I nice to ladies because I’m completely kind? Or am I nice to ladies because I want things from them, e.g., being liked by them?”

Because I don’t know you, I cannot answer the above questions for you. However, I can say that if you are extremely nice, ladies will feel this way: When somebody picks a fight in a bar, she will have to hide you behind her back.

Here is a different way to explain it: Talking with you is just like talking with her nice 80-year-old grandma. Is that sexy? No.

When the chemistry is not there, a lady switches on her analytical brain which makes rules for you. ☹

By contrast, “bad boys” don’t use logic to convince ladies. As a matter of fact, they are creative because they change women’s mood rather than their mind.

For example, instead of being extremely nice to ladies, they challenge ladies in very interesting ways. They ask ladies, “Can you cook?” on a date so that women want to prove themselves to these guys. ?

• How to recover from ‘the nice guy syndrome’:

If you have ‘the nice guy syndrome’ which stops you from attracting ladies, please take notes: When you communicate with a lady, your attitude has to be kind, yet your message must be more aggressive / firm / assertive. You can have a look at these examples:

1. When you are on the first date with a lady that you’ve met via internet dating, you maintain eye contact for some time during the conversation. Then you naturally break eye contact first. Now she begins to wonder how much you are attracted to her.

• Say this to a lady, “I like your look. Beauty is common. Yet you seem like you definitely have character.” In this way, the lady is keen to show you how interesting her character is.

• Say this to a lady, “I like that blouse / dress / skirt. They are quite popular nowadays.” Then she really wants to be different from other ladies.

• If she gives you a hug at the end of the date, you say this to her “You’re tiny” in a loving manner. Now the lady starts to wonder if she is tall enough for you. Apparently, this idea only applies to ladies who are significantly shorter.

• She wants to be modest and says, “My gardening skills are pretty average.” So, you say this to her, “If you are average, we won’t get along” in a joking fashion. From now on, this woman wants to be outstanding.

In conclusion, your tone must be kind and positive; nonetheless, what you say suggests very high standards. ?

• Why you should use our video / audio chat feature at Simply Dating:

Internet dating is a bit different from traditional dating / offline dating. You meet someone online and your brain builds that person’s image based on your imagination. Sometimes a woman may not look like her photos, so you have to find out whether the lady you are talking with actually looks like her photos. The best way to figure it out is to use our audio / video chat feature on this internet dating site.

A lady is supposed to make an effort in order to prove herself to you. That’s why Eastern European ladies are always very presentable and elegant.

“Keen to find real love? Internet dating gives you so many options and opportunities to meet your true love.”