The importance of self-love in online dating

September 2, 2021 at 9.15am by in Dating advice
online dating

Love is the eternal theme of art, music, movies as well as our society. However, Don Draper once said, “The importance of love is exaggerated by marketers like me so as to sell nylons.” Well, though Don Draper is obviously flawed, I think self-love is surely more important than romantic love in many ways. Please let me explain.

  • Radical self-love is the true prerequisite of having self-worth.

A person with low self-esteem would assume that having a partner will certainly make them feel better and high-value as they are probably thinking… “If I do not have a romantic partner, I am definitely a worthless individual.” As a consequence, they tend to believe that romance is the real solution to their painful problems. Unfortunately, that’s often why (and how) stressful relationships begin. Here is why:

When you do not even love yourself, some individuals will easily take advantage of your relatively low self-esteem. Consequently, you could be used by users, abusers and losers. That is to say, low self-esteem oftentimes attracts a bad relationship without you knowing it. Please note that you are totally responsible for your happiness as well as your life.

In contrast, if you understand the significance of radical self-love, you will have the strength to build your self-worth unapologetically and proactively. As your self-worth becomes higher, you will be able to radiate sparkling joy and happiness which will then attract high-value people in the online dating space. 😊

online dating
  • Radical self-love helps you to maintain your high standards.

Without radical self-love, you might expect somebody else to make you happy or make your life complete. As a result, you may have written down high standards that the right person has to meet, yet as you begin to date a woman who may make you feel a little bit better or possibly give you what you desire, your standards go out of the window all of a sudden. This is extremely common, sadly.

By contrast, if you fully understand the power of self-love, you will not forget your non-negotiables. Most importantly, you will be able to stick to your fundamental standards. Hence, you will not have your key standards violated or boundaries crossed. Interestingly (and not surprisingly), as you maintain your high standards, your lady actually respects you much more. In other words, this builds a virtuous circle – a more loving partner, a more rewarding relationship, much more self-love…

  • Radical self-love keeps a romantic relationship exciting.

If you are already in a romantic relationship, you probably want to know how to make this relationship exciting and sparky in the long term. Well, my answer is pretty simple (although it’s not always easy): Radical self-love keeps a relationship exciting and interesting.

Usually, the true reason why a long-term relationship loses its spark is because two individuals depend on the romantic relationship and lose themselves in this process. Yes, when you do not even know what you desire or do not even know how to ask for what you deserve, this confusion leads to resentment, stress and a toxic relationship. Thus, you have to get clarity in the first place.

Nonetheless, if you clearly know who you really are, who you want to become and your vision, mission & interests, you will definitely take care of your own needs in the first place. Therefore, you are independent, confident and satisfied. This trait makes your lady feel permanently attracted to you in the long run. As you both prioritize radical self-love, now you have a lot more to bring to this relationship – your own cups are full already, so this satisfying relationship stays enjoyable, meaningful and… sparky. 😉

A few years ago, I read a very good book called Radical Self-love which was written by my favorite blogger, author and public speaker Gala Darling, a very intelligent and hardworking Internet influencer. Her work has given me tremendous inspiration, so I do sincerely acknowledge her on this blog today. When Gala Darling was younger, she used to go out while wearing a red shoe and a blue shoe because she wanted to express her creativity. Interestingly, last week when I was looking at beautiful shoes designed by Sarah Jessica Parker, I noticed that Sarah Jessica Parker has the same idea!

“Self-love is of vital importance in the online dating space.”

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